It's Friday again :)

Thank you so much for the hugs, and words of support on my post last week.

This week has been SO much better. The morning routine has been struggle and stress free...and a day that starts well is a blessing in many ways!

I've finally nailed down the recipe for poached eggs. The husband and I don't eat eggs, but the daughter loves them. I didn't know how to cook them, so the only way I've recently learnt to cook eggs is to poach them. Very British, thanks to my friend A who taught me. She can eat as many as you give her, but I limit to 1 at a time. She loves fruits, and veggies, so here is what her breakfast looked like this week:

Another reason for this week going great is that soccer practices got cancelled due to high heat. 108F expected later today. It left our weekday evenings wide open, and the kids enjoyed play dates, or running errands, or simply playing at home. I've resolved to keep at least 2 evenings free for "play". Although they enjoy the activities and never complain about them, it does take a toll at the end of the week. Right now, all we have is soccer...and only after soccer ends, I'll think about restarting Taekwondo.

I've also been able to cook healthy meals all week. I love soaking a bunch of dals with rice for multigrain dosa batter, which I can use for a couple of days. I vary the ingredients each time, and this is what I soaked this week. I added quinoa to kick up the protein content. And I used the high temps to get the batter to ferment well :).

The long weekend was so relaxing and fun. We checked out three new parks, ate yummy homemade meals, met friends, and had a family beach day. Even though the beach was crowded due to near perfect weather on a long weekend, it's the beach - always welcoming, always has enough sand+waves for everyone, and never fails to relax you with its atmosphere. The Pacific waters were surprisingly warm as well.

And last but not the least, I spent time prepping for my little man's birthday tomorrow! He is celebrating it in school today, will celebrate with grandparents tomorrow, and will have a big party (along with this sister) next weekend! I love him to the moon and back - and I am SO very grateful for his presence in our lives! Happy birthday my one and only, Rusliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!

Have a good weekend everyone! 

Post 3 - I love you because....

You love me :) :)!

The daughter made these two cards for her little brother who is going to turn 2 this week!

She sacrificed her afternoon nap yesterday to make these. I'm very pleased....aren't they precious?

The wording inside comes from her - the teacher helped her write it, and she traced on it.

It's all about give and take at this age. Do you love me? If yes, I love you too :) :)!

Being close in age, the kids constantly compete with each other...hence the mention of sharing toys.

But they do care for each other, deeply and passionately. And as they grow up, that's the one thing that matters the most!!!!

FOUR

Oh, how time is flying by!

My baby, the one who gifted me with the precious label of "mumma"....
The one who is so sensitive that she keeps getting hurt a zillion times each day....
The one who is incredibly compassionate and caring...
The one who is smart (and is aware of it too :))....
And the one, my only daughter, who is breathtakingly beautiful, inside and out - turned FOUR last week!

After a year of terrific (as well as terrible as) 3's, we are now entering the world of Fantabulous 4's. I can't wait to see what she has in store for us :).

This was her first birthday without grandparents, and her aunt n uncle from San Diego. Leading up to her birthday weekend, we were feeling the void of their presence, and I was not sure if the husband, son and I would be enough for her.

But we were. Along with many of our friends.

The day of her birthday, the son decided to sleep in. He is undoubtedly the first one to wake up in our house. But not on his didi's birthday. He KNEW. She woke up, and spent time cuddling with her mum n dad in bed. We came to the living room, and spent more time together. She got lots of calls and messages. HE LET HER HAVE HER MOMENT.

We fed her breakfast, dressed her up, and took her to school to celebrate with her friends. I know she had a great party at her school.

We then took her to Olive Garden, one of her favorite restaurants, for lunch. We had the best lunch ever. And the waitress surprised her with a dessert plate of sugar-dusted donuts, chocolate+cranberry sauce, and a candle to blow. Our fellow diners joined in to wish her happy birthday. It was a first-time experience for her and she was thrilled!!!

 In the evening, I baked a small cake for her at home. She helped me measure the ingredients and put it all together. It became more of a brownie than a cake, but it tasted good. We had some friends over with gifts and she basked in all the attention.

The next day was her party at MYGYM. We had already celebrated her 2nd birthday here, but she insisted on the same place again. I wanted her to be happy, and stuck with her choice. This year, I also listened to my inner voice, and decided to only invite people (apart from her school friends) who are close to us, and who have made a continuous effort to spend time with our family in the past year. We have a zillion acquaintances but not many close friends. I also considered the age group of the kids, and if they were too old or too young, I did not extend an invite to them. Turns out, excluding her school friends, we only had 5 families that I needed to invite- it was a short, sweet, stress-free list, as well as planning for us!

The party was a blast. The daughter knew each kid who came, and was very comfortable. I have never seen her SO happy at a function, through and through. Not a single meltdown or tantrum. I did not have to engage in any fake conversation, or put up fake smiles with any of the guests. It felt natural to be among those who we are close to.

All in all, we will remember and cherish these happy moments for a long time to come.

As usual, my wish for her is to be healthy, happy, be adventurous and free spirited, compassionate, and appreciate life and its little pleasures a lot more than all the material comforts. Being inquisitive and always questioning me, like she always does - I hope that never changes!

I love my little girl!

November - The gratitude month

November.

It is my birthday month. So I have always loved it. (18th, if you are curious :)).

But after coming to California, and having lived here for 14 years, its meaning has evolved for me.

- First of all, its the weather. October and November are so beautiful out here. Warm afternoons, patio lunches, slight chill in the morning and evening but you can still go out n about with just a light jacket on you.
- FALL COLORS
- Halloween fun (I love dressing up the kids aspect, hate the candy aspect) (technically, it's on October 31, but it's almost November :))
- Thanksgiving travel (since we don't celebrate it with a turkey dinner, we travel :))
- And last but not the least, the general feeling of "giving" and "expressing gratitude/thanks" all around. I've also observed people are happier, mainly because of the spending days ahead of them. Shopping is exciting, for most people anyway.

On FB (yep, it had to be featured here), many of my friends post their thankfulness list on a daily basis. And because it's a social media website, you will find people mocking about it too :).

I had been toying with the idea of doing a blog marathon on gratitude for this month, instead of FB updates.

And when I gave more thought to it, after having observed what everyone else is posting - I realized that as part of my daily bedtime routine, I already express gratitude for all the blessings in my life.

What new would I add to that list by doing the blog marathon?

Instead, I'd like to post more often about encounters or experiences, which make me feel grateful on a daily basis.

If I think about today, these are the things that happened:

As I dropped the daughter off at school, one of her classmates was having a rough morning. He just did not want to be at school. He stood there at the door and kept crying. My daughter was sooper nice to him, and held his hand and walked him inside the classroom. As his dad and I walked out, he asked me "Will he be okay?" and I told him: "He's going to be fine. They all have such days. Do something fun with him in the evening. Plan a small surprise, maybe get a cupcake on the way home." It instantly lighted up his face. He was less worried. I feel like I made a difference in his day. "Small talk" always helps, when used at the right moment.

My next stop was at the son's daycare. His caregiver told me that a neighborhood lady was complaining about her daycare parents driving very fast in the morning in the neighborhood, and that she was going to complain to the police. She was very worried, and was looking for reassurance. I drive really slow, and she knows that. But I assured her - I said just warn all the parents, and ask them to be extra careful, especially if that particular lady is outside or her children are playing outside. Be sensitive to her complaint but don't worry beyond that. We are not going anywhere else because of such a minor issue. It put her at ease. Giving her reassurance and putting trust in her made a difference.

And then as I walked into work, I realized I had to get a temp badge. The security guard had Christmas Carols on his playlist. And I LOVE Christmas Carols. I went to a Convent and loved every aspect of Christmas celebrations during my school years. So I told him, "wow you have Christmas Carols playing already". He started defending himself "Oh it's just one song on the playlist. It's not that time of the year yet." And I told him: "I LOVE Christmas Carols. I don't mind listening to them anytime of the year." And it brought a huge smile on his face :).

We are conditioned to expect more criticism than positive remarks, in today's world. With much of our communication between people being virtual, so much - like facial expressions, a hug or some form of touch, reacting appropriately after reading someone's face, etc. is lost. I don't like that. I still try to meet with friends in person. I prefer video chat with my parents over a phone call or email. I prefer calling up my friends in other countries/continents vs emailing them. I prefer visiting India every year to catch up with my family and friends than simply waiting years before meeting them face to face. As much as I love Facebook for the value it brings into my social life, I don't let it replace the connection that happens when you connect via non-virtual means, especially in person.

Such are the things I would like to write about, and I would prefer to write them as they happen, vs. forcing myself to do a post every day, and be repetitive.

Having expressed how I feel, I still really appreciate everyone who is doing it, and enjoy reading most of it.

Now, I'm looking forward to my birthday weekend getaway, and Thanksgiving travel :).

November, I'll always love you :)!

Post #300

Last year, on this day, I was lugging around a 40-week pregnant belly (yep, my due date was 9/9), wondering why this baby was making me wait soooooooo much (especially after the doctor had confidently told me the baby will be early)!. My curiosity about having a son or daughter was at its peak, and I was also very anxious about the whole labor and delivery process, along with establishing a good breastfeeding relationship with this new baby.

Well, he arrived just a few days later (we are celebrating his first birthday this week :)), labor was tough but I had an amazing birth experience, and he was a champ at nursing. I could not have asked for more, and I'm very grateful!

This year has been a learning experience for us. It has been the toughest on the daughter - she loves him, she hates him, she really has a lot of conflicting and uncertain emotions running through her. We have been mostly patient, understanding, and sensitive - but there have been times (more often than I would have liked) when we have had to be strict and discipline her.

Overall, though, however it happened, I'm glad she got a sibling. I cannot think of even one moment where I have felt that this was a bad idea, for any of us.

And the baby - well, he has stayed true to his name - the ever peaceful one. He is the calm in our everyday stormy life. He patiently bears all the tantrums, whining, and hitting from his big sister. If and when he expresses his angry or frustrated emotions,we know that things have gone beyond a certain limit - and we can't help but melt away and simply cuddle him and hug him tight - he's a true man in that sense, very very strong from outside, but a softie from within.

She is my drama queen and he is my warrior of peace!

This last weekend - they were both sick. The daughter came home from school with 103.5F fever, and the son came down with a stomach bug. We don't have parents right now with us (although they are coming back for his birthday this week - yay :)), but thanks to our friend A, we got by. It was not easy, but it was alright. They are better now, and I hope they stay that way.

I was looking through a few saved drafts this past weekend, and realized this would be Post #300. So I had to pen down a new, latest one. 300 posts - WOW! I never thought I would get here any day. It's been so effortless. I only write when I really feel like it (except for the marathon I did as a challenge), and I have also managed to keep this place hidden from most of the people I interact with in real life.

I cannot stand all the attention most bloggers seek on every little thing they write (nothing wrong with it, just not my cup of coffee :P). I also do not like to take part in contests, or publicize my posts on social media. I often wonder about the privacy aspects of putting up pictures of my kids online, and sharing my life....but so far, except for one instance when a person I knew was stalking me, I have not felt the need to stop sharing here.

Hubby's 6-week bonding leave comes to an end tomorrow. He now truly appreciates the role of home-makers who tirelessly work day and night to keep the house running and keep the family well fed and happy. I hope he values the lessons he learnt as they were invaluable. This time given to him to just be home with the son was truly a gift.

Over the labor day long weekend, I made a last minute plan to go to the Sonoma Coast. I got hotel reservations right by the bay for one night, and also managed to take a friend and her lovely family along with us. We had a blast - we spent time at the beach on both days (even though the Pacific was COLD, the sand was warm)....kids made sand castles, flew kites, fed the birds, ran around, had FUN! On our evening walk, we spotted seals and dolphins. We saw lots of ranches with cows and sheep on the way. We saw beautiful vistas along HWY1, on a stretch I had not explored before - I returned home so happy and content. On the drive back, we saw gorgeous double rainbows (end to end) in the fields by the freeway.

The son had his first minor fall (from the hotel bed) and got a bruise. His ped said "oh it was a matter of when, not if" when we went for a follow-up. The daughter got lost for a few minutes when she was pretending to hide and we could not find her. I went to the jacuzzi at night, only to be called 5 mins later by the hubby who could not put either kid to bed - haha. So the trip was eventful as well :)!

So that's pretty much a snapshot of what's going on at my end. How about you? Anything fun happening in your lives?

Ending the post with some pictures....hope you like them :)

 

Turning TH-REEEEEEEE!

Even though I specifically told her not to, my daughter turned three last week ;) 

And what a year it has been - Terrific and Tough! At least the tough part - the terrible two's - are now behind us. Let's see what the three's have in store for us :)!

To my daughter.....

Your year started off with mumma being heavily pregnant and anxious about the baby. We did not know whether it was a boy or girl, and the doctor had said that the baby would arrive early, but the little one was very comfy in his mumma's tummy and arrived past his due date. I had an amazing birth experience, and was delighted to have a son to pamper. And you became a BIG sister!

But you, my betu, hated him. You probably still do. Although, my personal opinion is that you LOVE him a lot more than you hate him. You had a rough time accepting his presence in our lives in the beginning, but in the last 11 months, you have come a long long way. You are now very possessive about him, and you explicitly tell guests that you don't want to share him with them. 

It's a different story that you will share your toys with every other kid but your brother; but when you wake up, you look forward to playing with him; when you sleep, you hug him and kiss him; when we go out, you want to push his stroller; when he wants to snack, you want to feed him; when you take a bath, you want to bathe with him. I love how protective you are of him. I love how excited you get when I tell him that very soon, he will be walking and talking. You can't wait to go on walks with him, and sing loudly with him. Its a blessing to see you transform into a caring big sister role. 

Growing up together - you two will have your fights, moments of jealousy and competition, antics to garner more attention, and what not, but I hope, deep down in your hearts, you always value and cherish the sense of belonging and love for each other.

Personality wise, dear deeku, I'm in awe of you. Really. You had the TIME of your life in India. I was so nervous about managing you and your brother full time, but you took to India - its life, its culture, its people, its food, its weather - like a fish takes to water. I loved watching you living the life I once lived as a child.  

You've reminded us pretty much every single day, why the terrible two's are called so. You are very defiant, or as I read somewhere, defiant with a smirk. You constantly test our boundaries. You know when you are wrong, but still keep pushing your limits. Being exceptionally smart, vocal and independent, you get your way most of the times. 

While potty training you was very easy for us, we continue to have difficulty when you want to assert independence at every step of the potty process. Even when you know you can't reach the basin to wash your hands, you want to do it 'byself'. If you don't get all the soap off your hand and I try to help you, you throw a fit. Sometimes you want to flush yourself, sometimes you want me to do it. You are like this highly volatile volcano who can erupt anytime, and even after eruption, continue to blow out ash and fumes into the atmosphere. 

We see this behavior in pretty much all aspects of your life. With your brother, at times, you are the most loving sister on earth. In a matter of seconds, you hit him. There are days when you wait for the moon to be seen and keep staring at it in peace, and other days, you are terrified of the moon having monsters and ask me to close all the blinds in the house.

Feeding you continues to be challenging. And knowing you so far, I think it will be an ongoing battle with you. You find eating as a boring and time-wasting exercise. The same goes for sleep. It's boring for you....you say you will lose sooooooo much time if you nap. The sun will go away and it will be dark. I can empathize - if I'm reading a book I'm hooked to, and I'm asked to suddenly stop and sleep, I would feel the same way too. For you, every moment, every day, is happening. So meals and sleep are boring for you.

On a few occasions, I've been overwhelmed with your behavior, and have yelled at you, or given you a timeout, or, rarely, have slapped you. But most of the times, I feel you are just asking me to uncover more and more layers of patience, and unique ways to discipline you in a gentle manner.

I can already see you developing empathy, which is profound. When I tell you that I missed you, you cup my face between your palms, and kiss me on both cheeks. You tell me not to worry and that you are the cutest thing on earth. When I drop you at school and tell you that I will pick you up in the afternoon, you say you will miss me, and you will be waiting for me. You LOVE hugs, cuddles, sleeping cozy-cozy with me all night, and being mushy with me. I'm your favorite person in the house, and you have no idea how precious I feel about that!

You are a total chatterbox. You start yapping from the second you wake up, and continue until you go to bed at night. Whether its singing bollywood songs or rhymes , whether its talking about our travels or what we did during the day, whether its describing your day at school, or whether its telling us "hey I have idea" - every person in the house has this silent smile on their face when you are talking. You come across as a very charming personality when you talk. People who talk a lot whine a lot too, but let's just erase that from our memory.

Your cognitive skills are strong - you can quickly solve puzzles, use blocks of various kinds to build things, remember store names & directions, names of people, lyrics of songs, shapes, colors, letters, numbers, play board games, play dress up, form shapes from things on the street, observe objects and shapes in the cloud formations, do puppet shows, and a whole lot more. My job is to nurture these gifted strengths of yours, and I hope I do a good job of that.

You like to leave your curls loose, and hate any kind of hair accessory. You love your hairdresser Jennie, and never say NO to a haircut. I see myself in you, as I had boy cut hair all the way until 10th grade or so. You are very particular about your clothes, your water bottles, your lunch bag, your snacks, etc. - you know exactly what you like and what you don't. 

You LOVE reading books. We have 1000+ books in the house now, and whenever I have to calm you down, I ask you to choose a book and sit down with you to read it. I am looking forward to watching you read by yourself in the next few years - it will be an awesome sight! 

You LOVE singing and dancing and bouncing/jumping. Your favorite song to dance is 'dholi taaro dhol baaje' right now. We went for Garba three times last year, and during the last outing, you were hooked to the music and the dancing. You danced non-stop for more than an hour, and even at midnight, you cried when we drove back home. I can't wait to take you this year....it's some I'm very passionate about and enjoy a lot, and what could be better than dancing to garba songs with your daughter?

You have an infectious smile. You love to laugh, and being goofy. You always crack jokes about farting and poop. You make fun of your brother who still wears diapers. I hope you always retain your great sense of humor, which, combined with your laughter, is absolutely magical. 

We have traveled quite a bit during this year. We went to San Diego and took you to SeaWorld. We've been to the beach several times. We spent 3+ months in India. We toured San Francisco and visited the Eastern Sierras. We made our yearly pilgrimage to Yosemite. And we took you to Disneyland on your 3rd birthday. You love flights, trains, boats, car rides.....it is much easier now to keep you busy and entertained during our travels. At new places, you often stop and observe the surroundings - the shells at the beach, the flowers at the garden, the birds, the rain, the waves. I hope your remain forever curious of the world around you.

I don't have much advice for you, except to ask you to be 'just' the way you are. To be kind and compassionate. To respect others and also stand up for yourself. To be unique. To be creative. To have moments of quiet and peace every day. To be content.

Quoting from "The Help" - always remember this betu - "You is kind. You is smart. You is important. You is strong."

And quoting Dr. Seuss, your favorite author at the moment: “Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”

I'll always be there for you, and will love you unconditionally. 

Happy Happy Happy birthday, betu! 

Love, 

Ma