Modes of transport....

The kids had their annual summer break from preschool earlier this month. Even though they go to a private school which runs year round, they get a break every quarter. Hubby and I always take time off during their break, and usually, we like to travel during this time. Our destination this time was the gorgeous Pacific North West - mainly the beautiful sights in and around Seattle.

Rather than taking a flight as we normally do, we decided to ride the train. I have amazing memories of numerous train journeys that I took with my family in India, and I wanted to create similar ones for my children. I was a bit apprehensive of the length of our journey (close to 24 hours), but decided to go for it anyway. It was a good decision. Even though we faced delays, we all thoroughly enjoyed our journey.

The best part was that the kids made friends with 2 girls who were traveling with their dad, and got ample time to play and bond with them. They did art, sang songs, played I spy, ran up and down and across compartments, spent time in the lounge, ate snacks and even napped at the same time. We enjoyed the pretty vistas and the ocean views as well, but making new friends was the highlight of their train ride.

We also rode the ducks of Seattle - an amphibian craft that rides on land as well as water. The kids were amazed when our bus turned into a boat and splashed into Lake Union on a gorgeous sunny afternoon. We saw many float planes take off and land right in front of us. Combined with the awesome music and energy of the fellow passengers, it was an experience to remember!

We spent an afternoon at Lake Sammamish State Park, and took the kids pedal boating. It was their first experience of boating, and it was our first time with both kids on a boat and no one else to assist. Even though the daughter was very apprehensive of getting in, soon after we got into the lake, she said she never wanted this boat ride to end :) {after all, we were pedaling, not them ;)}. The son wanted to jump around and splash water, and we had a hard time getting him to stay put on his seat....but he thoroughly enjoyed himself as well. It was an hour very well spent as a family.

On our last day in Seattle, we visited Alki Beach. It was a sooper hot day and there is no shade whatsoever on this beach. Rather than getting roasted in the heat, we decided to rent the Surrey. We biked the entire beach until we got to the end and were treated with magnificent views of the Seattle Skyline. The kids rode in the front seat, ringing a bell whenever they saw a pedestrian ahead of us. Once we were back, we bought them snocones which helped them cool down. I highly recommend this experience if you happen to be in the area.

I was chatting with the daughter on our flight back about these modes of transport, and I could see the happiness on her face while she recollected our outings. The smiles continued when they went back to school and shared it with their teacher and friends.

All these new experiences, combined with our long car rides to get to our destinations, made it a very memorable trip for us!

Memorial Day weekend trip

It's been a while I posted here....

We are all doing well. Great actually. The kids are at a stage where they play with each other ALL the time. From the moment they wake up to the time they sleep, they revel in each other's company. I can now relate to my friends and neighbors who always told us that 2 years apart is a great sibling age gap.

Our friend A has been renting a place in the redwood forest near Santa Cruz area since February of this year. And we have visited him three times already. He has a garage-converted-into-a-studio, right in the middle of redwoods. It's a short hike away from an excellent play ground for the kids, and about 15 mins away from the beach and many state parks.

The owner of this place, who lives next door, has a daughter and son our kids ages. Right from the first time we met them, the kids hit it off. They love bouncing together in the huge trampoline under the redwoods....

They love to chat, do crafts, play games - they immensely enjoy each other's company....

Every time we've been up there, including last weekend, we have been blessed with good weather, which makes our beach outings a ton of fun.

Whether its building sand castles, flying kites, playing ball with daddy, or paddling the waves.....the ocean always works its magic on all of us.

When we are not beaching, we are walking in the woods. The redwoods are simply amazing. The forest is always lush green, shaded and temperature controlled, and never fails to rejuvenate me with its therapeutic properties. The redwoods stand tall, each telling us a story.

During our walks, we can hear the loud squeaks of the Acorn woodpecker or the harsh sounds from the Steller's Jay. The banana slugs, when spotted by the kids, bring us to a standstill. The slugs move oh-so-slowly and the kids are fascinated by them.

Last weekend, we walked 3+ miles in the forest. To make it more fun, we did races on the trail. We sang songs. We learnt about the flora and fauna. We stopped at the Redwood grove for lunch. And we stopped by the visitor's center to view the exhibits.

The kids love climbing and jumping off of fallen tree trunks.

It is a true Shinrin-yoku experience - breathe....relax....wander....touch....listen....heal!!!!

And we can't wait to visit again :)!

Spring Break

Today morning:

Me (to the daughter): YAY! It's the last day of school before spring break.
Her: No. It's not spring break.
Me: We have the weekend, and next week there is no school. It is spring break.
Her: No. It is only spring break if we go to the forest, to the beach, we see animals in the jungle.
Me: Sometimes we can stay at home too.
Her: Then it's not spring break. Spring break means vacation.
Me: Got it, sweetie.

{While she's at school today, I'm planning our adventures for next week :)}.

On forgiveness

Last night, I lost my temper on my daughter.

She was out for a walk with her brother and daddy, and while they were away, I put some glue+glitter on a small card she had made for her friend (it was a rainbow). She had been asking me to help her with glitter on this card since a couple of days now, so I wanted to surprise her when she came back from her walk.

I had just left the card to dry on the kitchen counter, and it had a lot of excess glitter that needed to be shaken off into the dust bin before she could 'mail' it in an envelope to her friend.

The kiddo came back home and walked straight to where the card was, and before I had any time to react, dumped the entire thing on the floor.

On the other hand, the son was crying profusely coz he fell on the concrete right outside our main door.

It was all a bit too much for me to take in, and when I saw the entire kitchen floor covered in glitter, I simply lost it. I got angry, upset, held her roughly and sent her to the bedroom, and yelled at her. I did not hit her (thank god) nor did I physically abuse her in any way. But you can say I verbally abused her, which is worse, right?

I felt guilty all evening. I cleaned the floor, I cooked food, I got them dressed after their bath, and got them ready for bedtime.

And when in bed, I told the daughter: "I'm sorry. Mumma got very upset at you. It won't happen again. I got angry when you spilled glitter. Please ask me before you touch something I've done next time."

You know what she told me? She said: "Mumma, it's okay. Sometimes you can get angry at me. I forgive you. I am sorry too, for spilling. I love you a lot."

Gosh - I got so emotional. Those were very wise words, coming from a 4 year old. She had true forgiveness and love for me written all over her face, and in her eyes. We connected, and we understood each other - that meant the most to me in the world. A real lesson on forgiveness....

Meanwhile, the son was a mute spectator....while I yelled at the daughter, and also while this apology discussion was happening.

And he quietly chimed in: "Mumma I'm sorry too".
I asked: "Why are you sorry?"
And he said: "Because I fell down and got booboo on head."

We all burst out laughing. And we had our nightly tickling session. And we drifted off to sleep, snuggled tight with each other!!!!

Eight

I made this card for the husband, on our 8th wedding anniversary today :)

We are in a really good place with our relationship right now....and I am grateful for that. I cannot say the same thing about the early years, or the stressful times when we had job changes, infants, lots of expectation mismatches, and little faith in each other.

But we have both worked to make it better; finding humor during stress, finding each other's love language, expressing ourselves frankly, and working as a team w.r.t parenting.

There is still room for improvement, but we are clearly headed in the right direction.

Happy Anniversary, my love!

Short Stories from India - 1

Every India trip, I meet people whose life stories are so intriguing. I try to provide a listening ear to many such people I meet, and I can see them pouring their heart out to me. It's comfortable to confide in - mainly coz they know I am a visitor, a stranger to them otherwise, and will leave their surroundings soon.

These stories, they change me. Just like reading every single post from HONY does. Brandon, from HONY, is the inspiration behind starting this series on my blog here.

Meet Sangeeta. Our cook. 

She has been coming to our house since 2007. She is the first maid to show up every morning. Always on time, always well dressed, always with a smile on her face. Rarely takes a day off. 

When the kids wake up every morning, they find her in the kitchen, making fresh hot phulkas or yummy parathas for the family. They ADORE her. My son keeps asking about her often, and recently, we did a video chat with her so the kids could see and talk with her.

Her story? She is in her mid-thirties, and has a 23 year old son, who is her entire life. She got pregnant when she was 13, and her man left her when he found out about her pregnancy. Her brave, kind and loving parents took her in, and helped her raise her son. She still lives with her parents. 

You see a huge red bindi on her forehead? She dresses up as if she is married, to avoid harassment from men. When I asked why she didn't marry anyone again, she said she didn't want to risk her son's future with a new man. 

She never went to school, so she made sure her son did. He is now a graduate and working. She does not want him to get married anytime soon. She wants him to work for a few years, buy a home, settle down, before starting a family. 

I love our morning talks. She asks me about my life, my work, what I cook, the weather, everything. I ask her about her clients, her family, what she does on her days off, what she cooks on festivals. I like to listen, and she likes to talk. 

I am extremely proud of her. The way she lives with dignity, and the way she has raised her son, being a single teenage mom. I'm sure it has been a tough life, but you don't see it on her face. 

Instead, she is always simply happy for me, my family, and has only the choicest of blessings to offer to my children! 

God bless her! 

January, so far.....

Happy New Year to all of you!

January has been a mixed bag of emotions for us so far.

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Good news first....

I completed 14 years at Intel - and I'm really looking forward to my second sabbatical!

How does it feel? Pretty good. Not like corporate slavery a bit. I'm grateful for being in positions which have always challenged me, and kept me away from politics, paper-pushing and managing people.

However, I feel the need of changing my profile in the near future. My current job is one of the best I can find (architecting new technologies), but I'm tired of the group I work with. Hardly any women around as you go up the ladder (Intel ranks very poorly in growing tech women), and some of the men are just too ruthless. A change would be good - but a change also means my work-life balance, which is superb currently, could go for a toss. Decisions, Decisions....

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So, 14 years at Intel, and 15 years since I left India. I had no idea how life would shape up for me when I arrived here. But I'm grateful that I got a job within 9 months of landing in this country, and by the time I graduated I had enough savings to pay off my student loan. I never got laid off, and we are able to raise our family in a small town with all the perks of a city. I really could not have expected anything better.

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Last January, the son developed breathing issues, and had to be rushed to ER. I pulled him out of daycare, and had no idea what to do. Spoke to mum n dad, and they decided to come down and help for 6 months. They are my superheroes, honestly. They are far better at raising my children than me. And because of them, my kiddos went through the year without needing to be medicated. (They got sick but nothing out of the ordinary).

Come this January, and the son is sick again. Parents were here until a few days ago, and right after they left, he has come down with a bad case of flu. Combine that with a croupy cough, and my child is miserable. We've been home all week nursing him back to health. Experience, good or bad, always helps.....and so we are much better prepared this time. Please say a prayer for him - I really hope he gets better quickly and does not fall sick too much this year.

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The daughter will start Kindergarten later this year. I went for an orientation last night at a private school that is our #1 choice for her, and came back pretty frustrated. They have a 30-minute assessment test that the kids have to take prior to enrollment, and guess what? the test is on the IPAD. Something on the lines of GRE, where the questions get tougher if you answer them correctly, and easier if you go wrong. And I'm thinking, SERIOUSLY? She is only FOUR years old, and has no idea how to work on an IPAD. Apart from a few occasional songs or rhymes we play for the kids, they never use it. No games, no apps.

We focus on reading, life skills, fine motor skills, play play play, having fun, and that's it.

The public school we have is great, but it does not have a good after-school care program. And since we both work full time, we have to put her in private for at least a couple of years.

Again, I have some tough decisions ahead of me. Thankfully, I have options, and I'll have to work harder on making them work. Or I just have to quit working and home school the children.

More on the test here: http://www.dnainfo.com/new-york/20140707/upper-east-side/quiz-are-you-smart-enough-get-into-private-kindergarten

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Our wedding anniversary is coming up later this month. We don't do gifts. We like to travel, but we are yet to plan a getaway this year. If the kids stay healthy, we will make it happen. If not, I'm looking forward to a nice dinner with the family :)!

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Those bad news that I talked about in December - they somehow don't see to stop. Or maybe I'm just extra sensitive lately.

A dear friend's son got hurt on the foot which got infected after sutures, and is still on antibiotics.

Another friend's 5-month old daughter was in ICU for pneumonia and had a rough time. She is now thankfully okay. Home and happy and healthy.

I met our friend who lost their 17 month old daughter last year - and could see how empty they felt. I could not ask them much about their ordeal, and I also found it hard to say anything about my kids to them. I don't think I can relate to their grief at all.

A colleague has been steadily losing weight without trying, and is very concerned about something wrong with his body. I'm concerned about him too - he is single and does not have family around here. Let's hope it's nothing serious when the tests results come.

There's more but I'll stop here....

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Mom n Dad were here with us for the holidays. They left right after New Year, and we are all feeling homesick in our own home - funny, isn't it?

The son is especially down....he refuses to chat with them on FaceTime and keeps saying that he wants them to come back.

I hope they come back soon, or we get to visit.....

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So that was the mixed bag so far - nothing fancy, but hoping it only gets better from here :) :)!!!!

Here's a sweet bonding moment that I managed to capture on my iphone - too cute for words :) :)!