The ocean.
The white sand.
The sand castles.
The shells.
The sunset.
The exotic hotel as a backdrop.
The loving family.
An evening to cherish :)
Playing at the End of Summer
1 day ago
March 7, 2011
An evening to cherish :)
The ocean.
The white sand.
The sand castles.
The shells.
The sunset.
The exotic hotel as a backdrop.
The loving family.
An evening to cherish :)
February 8, 2011
Taking the baby to the gym :)
It was a windy day today and both my baby and I are still terribly jet-lagged (we just got back from India over the weekend). We were in India for more than 3 months, and had a blast socializing with the entire family, meeting friends, chatting with neighbors everyday, and hosting a wedding in the family. Ruhi got the most attention and love from everyone. Being in India did wonders on her social skills development, and reduced her stranger anxiety to a great extent.
Ever since we have been back, its been kinda lonely. We are not going out much coz she sleeps a lot during the day, and the weather outside is a little bit chilly for her. However, I did not want to get stuck in a boring routine at home, so even though it was very windy today, I took her to a local kids gym for a trial class. This little studio has programs for babies (or bugs as they call it) as little as 4 months for motor skills development. Music, exercise, socializing - sounded like a fun thing to try :)!
Ruhi had an awesome time. There were 8 babies with their moms, 7 girls and 1 boy. The age group was perfect for her....they were all between age 6-9 months. The teacher was also fantastic. The class started with a couple of introductory songs where we were given rattles for the babies to rhyme with. We then did a few upper body gentle moves, after which we did some tummy exercises and some pseudo-baby-somersaults. I tried some of the moves for the first time with Ruhi, and was amazed at how well she adapted to them and liked them.
We then moved on to standing time (with support) during which she socialized with a cute 7-month old. Most of the stuff we did will help with her balance, co-ordination and body awareness.
The teacher then picked up Ruhi and took her to the bars (gymnastics portion of the class), where she tested her grip (which is very strong). She was happy with how Ruhi held on and said she has good core strength.
We then moved on to the most fun part of the class - blowing bubbles. We all stood in a circle with our babies standing up on our palms facing inside the circle (so that the babies face each other), as the teacher blew bubbles in the circle for the babies to play. Ruhi had a blast...she was trying to catch the bubbles while giggling and babbling. She was all smiles, even though she was tired and ready for her nap.
The class ended with two beautiful cleanup and goodbye songs. Overall, I am so glad I went. I got to meet other mommies in the area, and Ruhi had fun socializing with other babies her age.
There are a couple other studios in the area that offer the same kind of classes, so I will be checking them out in the next few weeks, and then will enroll in the one that I feel is best suited for us.
We are also planning to try out a kiddie swimming pool sometime soon, coz Ruhi loves bath time and splashing water around in her small tub at home.
Oh, the joys of parenting :)
Ever since we have been back, its been kinda lonely. We are not going out much coz she sleeps a lot during the day, and the weather outside is a little bit chilly for her. However, I did not want to get stuck in a boring routine at home, so even though it was very windy today, I took her to a local kids gym for a trial class. This little studio has programs for babies (or bugs as they call it) as little as 4 months for motor skills development. Music, exercise, socializing - sounded like a fun thing to try :)!
Ruhi had an awesome time. There were 8 babies with their moms, 7 girls and 1 boy. The age group was perfect for her....they were all between age 6-9 months. The teacher was also fantastic. The class started with a couple of introductory songs where we were given rattles for the babies to rhyme with. We then did a few upper body gentle moves, after which we did some tummy exercises and some pseudo-baby-somersaults. I tried some of the moves for the first time with Ruhi, and was amazed at how well she adapted to them and liked them.
We then moved on to standing time (with support) during which she socialized with a cute 7-month old. Most of the stuff we did will help with her balance, co-ordination and body awareness.
The teacher then picked up Ruhi and took her to the bars (gymnastics portion of the class), where she tested her grip (which is very strong). She was happy with how Ruhi held on and said she has good core strength.
We then moved on to the most fun part of the class - blowing bubbles. We all stood in a circle with our babies standing up on our palms facing inside the circle (so that the babies face each other), as the teacher blew bubbles in the circle for the babies to play. Ruhi had a blast...she was trying to catch the bubbles while giggling and babbling. She was all smiles, even though she was tired and ready for her nap.
The class ended with two beautiful cleanup and goodbye songs. Overall, I am so glad I went. I got to meet other mommies in the area, and Ruhi had fun socializing with other babies her age.
There are a couple other studios in the area that offer the same kind of classes, so I will be checking them out in the next few weeks, and then will enroll in the one that I feel is best suited for us.
We are also planning to try out a kiddie swimming pool sometime soon, coz Ruhi loves bath time and splashing water around in her small tub at home.
Oh, the joys of parenting :)
January 26, 2011
Breastfeeding vs Formula
Most of my reading these days is baby related. It's fascinating to learn how babies grow, and reading up on baby development also helps when things are not going perfect with my newborn. After all, we all want only the best for our kiddos, right?
My baby has been on the skinny side of the weight charts since her first doctor visit. She lost more than average weight during the first 3 days at the hospital, she battled jaundice during her first month, and after that she settled into her own growth pattern...which she has maintained till date.
Inspite of being told by doctors, family and friends that she is healthy and okay, I keep worrying about her weight gain. Sometimes when I am told she is skinny or very small or anything else related to this, I get affected. God knows how much I have read online on this topic, and I think I shall continue to do so for the next few months.
Inspite of this worry, I have exclusively breast fed her so far. I know its the best nutrition for her, and I have resisted all advice and temptation to switch her or supplement her with formula. Breastfeeding has been very challenging, and my entire day revolves around that. During the first few weeks, I had to track her feedings to report to the doctor, and I found it extremely stressful. Then my maternity leave got over when she was 6 weeks old, so I had to pump in the day and during the night to have enough milk for her feedings while I was away at work. When she was 3 months old, I took my long break from work and came to India with my parents. I then fed her on demand, and only expressed milk if I had to go out for an errand. I introduced rice cereal and couple other foods to her recently.....mostly to develop her taste buds.
Today, I gave her a taste of Formula. She drank it normally, just like every other thing she has tried so far. I just wanted to introduce her to the taste, and also occasionally be able to give her formula so that I have an alternative when I need it. Also, she is almost 6 months old, so I felt it was the right time to experiment with it.
I found the formula so easy to make. It took me less than 2 minutes.....and a bottle of milk was ready. It set me thinking about the last 6 months when I have had to do so much in order to keep my baby properly fed with my milk. Starting from my intake of food and keeping myself hydrated (both of which affect my milk supply instantly) to monitoring her intake, washing/sterilizing all the equipment used, etc etc - everything needs to carefully managed so that she is happy and content and never hungry.
For a second, I thought life would be so much simpler if I gave her formula from day 1. But I know what I am doing is the best thing for my baby, and I don't mind continuing until I can, and/or until she wants to.
From what I have read online and from the many people I have spoken to....almost everyone finds this challenging. I feel actually blessed to be able to breastfeed my baby...so many moms are not able to do so. In the US, formula feeding is much more common than in India. I could not even find a decent cover-up for breastfeeding in public at stores in the US.....the one I found was like 40 dollars.
There are lactation consultants and free clinics at most hospitals in the US, and many other resources to help with breastfeeding as well, but I don't know how many people take advantage of it. From my experience, nurses always insist on feeding formula if you are not explicit about your preferences. Pediatricians don't seem to care either what you choose to do. Whereas in India, I met 2 pediatricians, and both applauded me for my efforts. I also found breastfeeding in public much easier in India than in US.
Here is a good link explaining the benefits of breast milk: http://www.nrdc.org/breastmilk/benefits.asp
Now than I am going over the 6-month hump, I feel less stressed about the whole feeding thing. I hope the combination of solids, occasional formula and breastmilk brings some substantial weight gain in my daughter over the next few months :).
My baby has been on the skinny side of the weight charts since her first doctor visit. She lost more than average weight during the first 3 days at the hospital, she battled jaundice during her first month, and after that she settled into her own growth pattern...which she has maintained till date.
Inspite of being told by doctors, family and friends that she is healthy and okay, I keep worrying about her weight gain. Sometimes when I am told she is skinny or very small or anything else related to this, I get affected. God knows how much I have read online on this topic, and I think I shall continue to do so for the next few months.
Inspite of this worry, I have exclusively breast fed her so far. I know its the best nutrition for her, and I have resisted all advice and temptation to switch her or supplement her with formula. Breastfeeding has been very challenging, and my entire day revolves around that. During the first few weeks, I had to track her feedings to report to the doctor, and I found it extremely stressful. Then my maternity leave got over when she was 6 weeks old, so I had to pump in the day and during the night to have enough milk for her feedings while I was away at work. When she was 3 months old, I took my long break from work and came to India with my parents. I then fed her on demand, and only expressed milk if I had to go out for an errand. I introduced rice cereal and couple other foods to her recently.....mostly to develop her taste buds.
Today, I gave her a taste of Formula. She drank it normally, just like every other thing she has tried so far. I just wanted to introduce her to the taste, and also occasionally be able to give her formula so that I have an alternative when I need it. Also, she is almost 6 months old, so I felt it was the right time to experiment with it.
I found the formula so easy to make. It took me less than 2 minutes.....and a bottle of milk was ready. It set me thinking about the last 6 months when I have had to do so much in order to keep my baby properly fed with my milk. Starting from my intake of food and keeping myself hydrated (both of which affect my milk supply instantly) to monitoring her intake, washing/sterilizing all the equipment used, etc etc - everything needs to carefully managed so that she is happy and content and never hungry.
For a second, I thought life would be so much simpler if I gave her formula from day 1. But I know what I am doing is the best thing for my baby, and I don't mind continuing until I can, and/or until she wants to.
From what I have read online and from the many people I have spoken to....almost everyone finds this challenging. I feel actually blessed to be able to breastfeed my baby...so many moms are not able to do so. In the US, formula feeding is much more common than in India. I could not even find a decent cover-up for breastfeeding in public at stores in the US.....the one I found was like 40 dollars.
There are lactation consultants and free clinics at most hospitals in the US, and many other resources to help with breastfeeding as well, but I don't know how many people take advantage of it. From my experience, nurses always insist on feeding formula if you are not explicit about your preferences. Pediatricians don't seem to care either what you choose to do. Whereas in India, I met 2 pediatricians, and both applauded me for my efforts. I also found breastfeeding in public much easier in India than in US.
Here is a good link explaining the benefits of breast milk: http://www.nrdc.org/breastmilk/benefits.asp
Now than I am going over the 6-month hump, I feel less stressed about the whole feeding thing. I hope the combination of solids, occasional formula and breastmilk brings some substantial weight gain in my daughter over the next few months :).
December 5, 2010
Girl Child
Even before I got pregnant, I always wanted a daughter. And when we found out we were going to have one, I was beyond thrilled.
However, as and when I shared this news to people (mostly to people who asked me rather than me telling them), I was surprised at their reactions. All my non-Indian friends expressed their happiness, and it didn't really make a difference to them whether it was a boy or girl. But most of my Indian friends were not too happy. The kind of questions that followed after me telling them that I was having a girl were all bizarre.
It took me a little bit of time to shrug off their mentality....and I soon forgot about those comments.
Throughout my pregnancy, I came across many stories, articles and statistics about female infanticide. Here is one such story:
"Lakshmi already had one daughter, so when she gave birth to a second girl, she killed her. For the three days of her second child's short life, Lakshmi admits, she refused to nurse her. To silence the infant's famished cries, the impoverished village woman squeezed the milky sap from an oleander shrub, mixed it with castor oil, and forced the poisonous potion down the newborn's throat. The baby bled from the nose, then died soon afterward. Female neighbors buried her in a small hole near Lakshmi's square thatched hut of sunbaked mud. They sympathized with Lakshmi, and in the same circumstances, some would probably have done what she did. For despite the risk of execution by hanging and about 16 months of a much-ballyhooed government scheme to assist families with daughters, in some hamlets of ... Tamil Nadu, murdering girls is still sometimes believed to be a wiser course than raising them. "A daughter is always liabilities. How can I bring up a second?" Lakshmi, 28, answered firmly when asked by a visitor how she could have taken her own child's life eight years ago. "Instead of her suffering the way I do, I thought it was better to get rid of her." (All quotes from Dahlburg, "Where killing baby girls 'is no big sin'.")"
Each time I read something like this, I went through a mix of emotions - none happy or positive as you can imagine. Over time I would forget such stuff and focus on my baby.
The birth of my daughter is one of the happiest moments of my life, and motherhood has been amazing. I am thrilled to be spending my time off from work in India with my daughter. I am so happy that she is getting all the love from her grandparents, relatives, friends and so many neighbors here.
Today afternoon, I happened to have a casual chat with my neighbor's maid who rang my doorbell to borrow my neighbor's apartment keys. This maid's niece Rekha used to work in our house. Rekha had a baby girl couple weeks after me. In their community (rabari), having a girl is still considered a taboo.
So, coming back to my conversation today....I was asked whether I had a normal delivery or C-section. Rekha had to deliver via C-section coz her baby had the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck. Everyone had pity on her....and said if God had to tear her apart for having a baby, atleast he should have blessed her with a boy, instead of a girl. I said what the heck?
Rekha was very weak when she conceived, and probably did not eat well during her pregnancy either. She did not lactate at all, so she could never breastfeed and now her baby girl is on formula/cow's milk since birth.
Very soon, she will start working again, and her daughter Prachi will be left at home in the care of some aging relative or neighbor. I doubt whether she will be sent to school.
I cannot help but compare the difference in the lives of my daughter vs Rekha's daughter. Both girls born 2 weeks apart, and the difference in upbringing is going to be huge.
When will this mentality change?
When will people be equally happy on the birth of a girl?
When will a female child be given equal opportunity to go to school in such communities?
When will a daughter not be treated as a liability since birth?
Such and countless more questions filled my mind today after my chat today afternoon.
I am going to meet Rekha and her daughter Prachi very soon, and I am looking forward to it. I will do my best to talk to her and convince her into sending her kid to school. I don't mind sponsoring her child's education if need be. I hope, wish and pray that Prachi has a bright future ahead of her, just like I would wish for my daughter!
November 5, 2010
Diwali 2010
It's 4am here in Ahmedabad, India as I write this post. It's the morning after Diwali, and I can still hear the sound of fire crackers bursting in the neighborhood. I can also hear a distant sound of the morning aarti being played somewhere on a music system and hear prayers from a nearby mosque.
I am home for Diwali after 11 years....my first time since I moved to the US. I am actually spending Diwali in Ahmedabad after more than 20 years....we always used to go to Agra-Soamibagh which is our place of worship for Radhasoami faith during this time of the year. Diwali in Agra is much much more fun than here in Ahmedabad. There is chhoti Diwali and badi Diwali....the sweets out there are so authentic, the food so delicious. But just being anywhere in India during this time is amazing!
I did not burst fire crackers today.... neither did I go out for a meal......I was home with my daughter, my parents and my bapuji. It meant the world to me!
I always feel very lonely in US during this time of year. Festivals don't mean much without family around. We try to have parties, make sweets n savories, dress up in sarees and light diyas, but nothing compares to the feeling that you experience when you are surrounded by all your loved ones here in India.
After Diwali comes Thanksgiving n Christmas, and the feeling of loneliness reaches its peak by the end of the year. Every single year that I have been in the US during this time, I have felt miserable from within. Thanksgiving and Christmas are also times when family gathers, and I don't have that in the US. I do have really close friends who provide much needed warmth n love to make it bearable, and for that I am so thankful!
There are 2 things that made me very happy today.
My mom has a cousin in her native place, who is poor. He used to own a business, made huge losses, and has never really come out of it inspite of trying very hard. His wife is sick and bed ridden since last few years, and the medical bills due to her illness are huge. His elder son has stopped going to school coz they need him to work and bring home a paycheck. The younger son might follow soon if things don't improve soon. In the past few years, my mom n her siblings have provided much needed financial support to him. But my mom doesn't work, neither do any of her siblings. So its difficult for them to help beyond a certain limit. Yesterday morning, I was talking to my mom about few things that I would like to do during my stay here. And she asked me if I would like to help this family. I readily agreed.
My mom made a few phone calls and got a list of what her cousin's family needs right now. The list was so simple: 100kgs of wheat grain, 50kgs of rice, and 2 cans of groundnut oil for cooking. Mom called another relative who owns a grocery store in her native place, and had him send these things to her cousin. We will send the money for the stuff via mail tomorrow. This grocery would suffice their family for the next few months. By evening when this was all done, my mom was so so happy, she had tears in her eyes. Needless to say, the feeling inside of me was priceless!
I got reminded of this quote: "Charity begins at home"!
I do have fond memories of visiting this family during my childhood, and they used to treat us so well. I am looking forward to meeting them during my sister's wedding in January.
The second thing I did was visiting an old-age home with dad. There is one close to our house here where mom n dad go regularly and donate. All these females are socially and mentally abused. They have been abandoned by their family and have nowhere to go at this old age. Most of them are 70 years or older.
Today, we were given a list of medications for the 62 females currently residing there. Most of them have some illness - diabetes, heart problems, knee pain, back pain, etc. I will buy medicines that will suffice them for the next month. I also inquired if I could go visit them and talk to them personally, and they said I could, provided I don't ask them any personal questions about their family. I plan to do that once I settle down in a routine here. Maybe I will donate one day of meals - breakfast, lunch, dinner (costs $125) and have lunch with all of them. The few minutes that I spent in the premises today were humbling enough.
Apart from that, I went out in the city and bought a really cute traditional jacket for my daughter. This along with a pair of brown leggings is going to be her new year day outfit for Satsang tomorrow :). I'm excited to dress her up!!!! Diwali shopping is so much fun!
Today is new year day for us - we will make a full meal (vegetable, dal, roti, rice, appetizer, dessert, salad, yogurt, pickle) and do Satsang at home in the morning. In the evening we will take prasad and go for another Satsang with mom-dad-bapuji's Satsang group here. There will be lots of phone calls wishing "saal mubarak" to each other! I can't wait for the day to get started!!!!!
I wish all of you had a lovely Diwali and also wish you and your family a healthy, happy n peaceful year ahead!
I am home for Diwali after 11 years....my first time since I moved to the US. I am actually spending Diwali in Ahmedabad after more than 20 years....we always used to go to Agra-Soamibagh which is our place of worship for Radhasoami faith during this time of the year. Diwali in Agra is much much more fun than here in Ahmedabad. There is chhoti Diwali and badi Diwali....the sweets out there are so authentic, the food so delicious. But just being anywhere in India during this time is amazing!
I did not burst fire crackers today.... neither did I go out for a meal......I was home with my daughter, my parents and my bapuji. It meant the world to me!
I always feel very lonely in US during this time of year. Festivals don't mean much without family around. We try to have parties, make sweets n savories, dress up in sarees and light diyas, but nothing compares to the feeling that you experience when you are surrounded by all your loved ones here in India.
After Diwali comes Thanksgiving n Christmas, and the feeling of loneliness reaches its peak by the end of the year. Every single year that I have been in the US during this time, I have felt miserable from within. Thanksgiving and Christmas are also times when family gathers, and I don't have that in the US. I do have really close friends who provide much needed warmth n love to make it bearable, and for that I am so thankful!
There are 2 things that made me very happy today.
My mom has a cousin in her native place, who is poor. He used to own a business, made huge losses, and has never really come out of it inspite of trying very hard. His wife is sick and bed ridden since last few years, and the medical bills due to her illness are huge. His elder son has stopped going to school coz they need him to work and bring home a paycheck. The younger son might follow soon if things don't improve soon. In the past few years, my mom n her siblings have provided much needed financial support to him. But my mom doesn't work, neither do any of her siblings. So its difficult for them to help beyond a certain limit. Yesterday morning, I was talking to my mom about few things that I would like to do during my stay here. And she asked me if I would like to help this family. I readily agreed.
My mom made a few phone calls and got a list of what her cousin's family needs right now. The list was so simple: 100kgs of wheat grain, 50kgs of rice, and 2 cans of groundnut oil for cooking. Mom called another relative who owns a grocery store in her native place, and had him send these things to her cousin. We will send the money for the stuff via mail tomorrow. This grocery would suffice their family for the next few months. By evening when this was all done, my mom was so so happy, she had tears in her eyes. Needless to say, the feeling inside of me was priceless!
I got reminded of this quote: "Charity begins at home"!
I do have fond memories of visiting this family during my childhood, and they used to treat us so well. I am looking forward to meeting them during my sister's wedding in January.
The second thing I did was visiting an old-age home with dad. There is one close to our house here where mom n dad go regularly and donate. All these females are socially and mentally abused. They have been abandoned by their family and have nowhere to go at this old age. Most of them are 70 years or older.
Today, we were given a list of medications for the 62 females currently residing there. Most of them have some illness - diabetes, heart problems, knee pain, back pain, etc. I will buy medicines that will suffice them for the next month. I also inquired if I could go visit them and talk to them personally, and they said I could, provided I don't ask them any personal questions about their family. I plan to do that once I settle down in a routine here. Maybe I will donate one day of meals - breakfast, lunch, dinner (costs $125) and have lunch with all of them. The few minutes that I spent in the premises today were humbling enough.
Apart from that, I went out in the city and bought a really cute traditional jacket for my daughter. This along with a pair of brown leggings is going to be her new year day outfit for Satsang tomorrow :). I'm excited to dress her up!!!! Diwali shopping is so much fun!
Today is new year day for us - we will make a full meal (vegetable, dal, roti, rice, appetizer, dessert, salad, yogurt, pickle) and do Satsang at home in the morning. In the evening we will take prasad and go for another Satsang with mom-dad-bapuji's Satsang group here. There will be lots of phone calls wishing "saal mubarak" to each other! I can't wait for the day to get started!!!!!
I wish all of you had a lovely Diwali and also wish you and your family a healthy, happy n peaceful year ahead!
October 13, 2010
This....I LOVE :)
And here are 10 things about her that I LOVE:
- Her smile - infectious!
- Her eyes - bright n wide n ready to absorb the world!
- Her hair - she got the good genes :)
- Her cheeks - chubbylicious!
- Her tummy - she loves it when I tickle her tummy :)
- Her feet - oh so small n soft n pink!
- Her fingers n nails - pretty pretty!
- Her bum - cute n comfy!
- Her coos n babbles....they are music to everyone's ears.
- Her sleeping poses - the picture below speaks for itself!!!!
Love you my betu!!!!!
October 3, 2010
Two Months
As I reflect on the last couple months, there is so much to cherish....here's a few reflections and observations:
- When I see my baby smile, I'm over the moon - every single time. I'm smitten! I've heard people saying this before, and did not believe them. Now I will :)
- At 2 months old, she fits "well" into 6-9 month old outfits. Wonder what sizes I should carry for my long trip to India this month :). She is growing up way too fast!
- I thought I could never survive with less than 8 hours of sleep. I was wrong :)!
- I did not anticipate and realize how much joy the baby would bring into my parents' lives. They are just delighted to take care of her day-in and day-out. When I look at their happy faces every morning and every evening, I feel it's all worth it.
- All the love that the baby is receiving from my friends is more than overwhelming. Almost every thing except the travel system is gifted.....and more than gifts, people come over so often to play with her and spend time with us. I must have done something right in these last 11 years in the US to receive so much love and warmth from everyone. Thank you!
- The baby has loooooooooong legs....and she uses them well to kick hard and strong.
- I always wondered how her hair would be like - my mom, grandma and aunts have long straight silky hair, and the baby has those good genes...so happy for that!
- She loves body massages - we have joined an infant massage class, and I am learning how to do it on her....
- She loves bath time....I so hope she loves the water, and the ocean! I cannot wait to take her to the beach. And teach her how to swim!
- The baby binds and grows the whole family together. We forget about petty issues between us and focus on her instead. I read this quote recently which I really liked: "Babies control and bring up their families as much as they are controlled by them; in fact ... the family brings up baby by being brought up by him." -Erik H. Erikson
- I really don't care about losing weight and fitting into my old jeans.....I used to worry about such things often.
- I look forward to my play time with her every single morning....it fills me with so much energy and joy.
- I also love my quiet times with her....mostly during middle of the night feedings. She will stare at me while feeding, and occasionally smile....makes me want to eat her up!!!!
Babies fill our life with so much love....and are a huge blessing in our lives!
Before I know it, she is going to turn a year old, and then start walking, and talking. I am excited for my 4 month break from work coming up - I will get to spend all day with my baby!!!!
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