Remembering K Foi....

Last year, this time, I was in Mumbai at my in-laws. Before I got married, whenever we visited Mumbai, we would camp at my aunt's (dad's older sister) house. We were so emotionally close that she always complained about me not staying with her anymore and spending more time with my in-laws than her in recent years.

She was the BEST cook in our house. Years ago, she owned a fast-food joint in Andheri and ran a sooper successful business. Whenever we visited her, she would pamper us with hot breakfasts, lavish lunches, and new items for dinner. During every trip, I would come back with atleast one new recipe from her. She made the best pani-puri's in the world.

Last year, during my visit, I met her a few times. And I also spent an entire day with her....we went shopping together :). And when we were near Andheri station, we saw McDonald's and she was craving junk food, so we went in and ate McAloo Tikki burgers, with fries and a drink (a true Happy Meal). It was a rare indulgence for her, as she was a heart patient and always closely watched her diet.

Last month, my dad made a trip to Mumbai just to spend time with her. He stayed for 3 days, and we did FaceTime while he was visiting. She saw the kids, and was delighted to see the son running around the house and talking so much......when she last met him, he was a chubby baby who liked to be held :).

Aunt K suffered a couple of heart attacks and passed away in hospital early Monday morning. She had health issues, but was managing quite okay when we last spoke. So it was sudden, and a shock for all of us. It's the first sibling loss for my dad or mom, and they are grieving a lot. As with such news, it takes time. Acceptance only comes later, after internalizing all the grief. I still can't believe it either. I am remembering all my conversations with her, and still can't believe that I will never be able to talk to her again :(.

It's been an emotional roller-coaster....to say the least. I feel bad that mom n dad cannot be there with the family at this time. They JUST arrived from India...it has been less than a week. I called them over because the son was constantly falling sick in daycare, and needed to be kept home. I pulled him out of daycare in early January, and worked from home for 3 weeks until mom n dad got here.

The parents are constantly on the phone with all my uncles and aunts.....talking about her life and remembering the good as well as the tough times. You see - she was the only one in our family who lost her husband 25+ years ago.....a young widow, she raised 3 young children by herself, and eventually they started working and helped her repay the debt that my uncle could not clear before his sudden death. She had a tough life, but I always saw her smiling. What I will always remember is her beautiful face, her long black tresses, and her lovely smile.

When I visit my older aunts and uncles now, they always tell me "good we met and spent time...who knows, we may never see each other again". And I understood the sentiment and reality behind the statement, but always shrugged it off in my mind. But it is really true. It's true for any of us, but more so for the aging generation. I am glad I visit India often and spend almost all my time with family. I try to visit as many relatives as possible. I've sacrificed many vacations and outings with friends just to be able to visit family in India. And I feel it has been the best use of my vacation time.

I love you K foi (that's what I fondly called her)....you will always hold a special place in my heart. May you rest in peace.